BFF K’s Review
Down in the kitchen, I find Jax, luckily alone. He never cared about flaunting his latest conquests around, but since Chloe has been staying here, I haven’t seen a single one. I’m extremely grateful, and I wonder if he even knows he’s doing it. “Hey man, what are you doing up so early?
Looking up from his overflowing bowl of Cap’n Crunch, he says, “Chloe isn’t exactly a quiet crier. But I’m used to it at this point. I don’t have anywhere to be, so I can just sleep all day.”
“Sorry about that. I think it’s just hitting her a little harder today. Stuff like your first day of senior year is important to girls like Chloe. It’s the first major life moment that her parents are missing.”
“I get it, dude. I haven’t said anything because she’s going through shit right now. I’m not a major asshole, or at least I try not to always be.”
Oddly enough, I think that’s the first normal conversation we’ve had in a long time. The Hartley brothers don’t have heart-to-hearts, as funny as that sounds. Honestly, if it weren’t for the band, I don’t think we’d be as close as we are. That’s about all we have in common. The silence drags on, and although it isn’t uncomfortable for me, Jax can never have it be silent for too long. He always has to fill the silence in some way.
One night when I was watching TV, Jax came in, and just like any older brother he took the remote and changed the channel. I thought about arguing, but I was too exhausted and went with it. Five minutes after he found something, I could hear mumbling. I looked over and his mouth was moving. “What the fuck are you doing?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, dude. I’m not doing anything. What are you doing?”
“Yes you are. Wait…are you saying all of the lines?”
“No. Why would I do that? That’s weird.”
After another five minutes, he started up again. He was oblivious to the fact he was doing it, or he couldn’t hold out any longer. Either way, it was some pretty funny shit.
“Do you think the Flash can turn his dick into a human vibrator during sex?”
And there it is. What the fuck? I stare at him incredulously. “Where do you come up with this shit?”
He holds up his juice glass, and I notice it’s adorned with the members of the Justice League. “C’mon, just think about it.”
I shake my head. “I don’t know. I guess that makes sense.”
“Dude, that would be awesome.”
I can’t believe we’re even having this conversation right now. “Just don’t tell the ladies your theory.”
“Because then they’d be disappointed in your lack of vibrating abilities.”
“Trust me, brother, no chick has ever left my bed disappointed.”
“Dude, I don’t want to know how any girl feels leaving your bed. That’s between you and whoever your latest hookup is.” He opens his mouth to say something, but Chloe walks in the room and he shuts it right back up. I don’t know what was going on between Chloe and Jax over the summer, but it stopped after that night. The two of them don’t even talk to each other anymore. Or more like Jax doesn’t talk to Chloe. I think he feels responsible for the accident, but I’ve told him time and again it wasn’t his fault.